


The Winds of Change

by EventHorizon



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Haircuts, M/M, mystrade
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-03
Updated: 2013-08-03
Packaged: 2017-12-22 08:24:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,249
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/911019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EventHorizon/pseuds/EventHorizon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Greg wants to change his hair... but he's the only one who likes the idea...</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Winds of Change

      “It’s a good idea, don’t you think?”

      “In which of the languages I speak would you care to hear my response?”

      “Oh come on, Mycroft!  Just for a little change!”

      “A significant alteration of one’s appearance does not constitute a ‘little’ change.  I am sorry, but I fail to understand why you would wish to savage one of your most appealing features.”

      “A hair cut isn’t a savaging.”

      “It _would_ be if you were allowed your way on this matter.”

      “I just want it a little shorter… something different.”

      “Would it suffice if I were to purchase you a new tie?  That would also be different and far more agreeable.”

      “No, and don’t go throwing my ties away just so you can go shopping.  Once was quite enough for that, thank you very much.”

      “They _belonged_ in the rubbish… I simply delivered them into their proper home.”

      “That’s it!  I’m making an appointment today.”

      “Gregory, do not make hasty decisions…”

      “I’m getting a haircut not enlisting in the Army.  Ok, I’ve got to go or I’ll be late for work.  Who knows, you might get a little surprise when I get home.”

      “I shall take steps to be suitably intoxicated to appreciate it.”

      “Just a haircut!”

      “I have the perfect brandy for the occasion, too.”

__________

      “Have you enlisted in the military?”

      “Shut it, Sherlock.”

      “It is a valid question.  You are near to bald and, given a suitably blind recruiting officer, could at least pass the first layer of fitness scrutiny.”

      “I am not bald!  Just got a haircut.  I think it looks great, actually!”

      “For a felon, perhaps, languishing in some third-world jail.”

      “It’s distinguished!”

      “It emphasizes the cuboid nature of your cranial architecture.”

      “You saying I have a square head?”

      “In a more educated manner, yes.”

      “Well, I like it.  It’ll take two seconds to dry after a shower, don’t have to worry about some idiot grabbing it during a scuffle, no combing, no little flyaway bits here and there… there’s no downside here.”

      “Except that you are now loathsome in appearance, which is quite the feat given your normally abhorrent presentation.  I believe I shall require some form of welder’s goggles if I am forced to look at you for any appreciable amount of time.”

      “You’re just jealous.”

      “Of what?  Surely not your hair, because one cannot be jealous of what does not actually exist.”

      “Let’s see… how much money do you spend on your fancy shampoos and products?  And how much time do you spend getting those curls just right and checking that you haven’t got a bat nesting in there somewhere.  Next time you’re getting ready in the morning, you just think of what you’re having to do and that I’ve waved goodbye to all that nonsense.”

      “I have no intention of thinking about your poor life choices at any time.  I am phoning John.  Perhaps he can convince you of the error of your ways.”

      “It’s just a haircut!”

      “And the Titanic was just a leaky boat.”

__________

      “Oh lord, he wasn’t kidding.”

      “Not you, too!”

      “Sorry, mate, but… did you lose a bet?”

      “Come on, John… it’s not that bad.  In fact, it’s not bad at all.  It’s very smart, I think.  Very tidy.”

      “Saying your hair’s tidy is like saying a woman has a great personality.  But… it’s not the worst I’ve seen, so there’s that.  Next pints on me to celebrate you not having the worst hair in the world.”

      “It’s just a simple haircut!”

      “Well, simple’s about as good a word as tidy, I guess.  What does Mycroft think?”

      “He hasn’t seen it.  I told him I was getting it, though, and he was about as enthusiastic as you and His Hairy Highness.”

      “Was there… some reason you decided to just lay down and let sheep graze on your head?”

      “It was just something new!  Something different.  Not the same _old_ thing, day in and day out.”

      “You nearly spit out the word _old_ , Greg.  Is it midlife crisis time?  Mycroft will not be happy if you take up with some young model and spend his money on a Ferrari.”

      “No… maybe… I don’t know.  I just wanted a little something fresh, that’s all.  Apparently, I was the only one.”

      “Well, it’s a shock, I’ll be honest about that.  But I’m sure it’ll grow on us.  And, if not, it’ll grow on you and you’ll be back to normal in a few months.”

      “If Mycroft’s even talking to me by then.”

      “He was really that upset?”

      “You’d swear I was getting a big tattoo on my face or something.”

      “You might consider it.  It’d distract him from your hair.”

      “I’m so glad you not actually my friend, John.”

      “Just trying to help.  Ready for that pint?”

      “How about ten?”

      “Good idea.  I’ll need them if I have to keep looking at your hair.”

__________

      “Mycroft?  I’m home.  Please tell me you’re not actually drunk.”

      “Hmmmm… no, not yet.  I am in the study surrounded by alcohol, however, should it become necessary to sink into intoxication.”

Lestrade peeked around the corner of the open door and crossed his fingers.

      ‘It is necessary to sink into intoxication.”

      “ARGH!  It’s not that bad!”

      “Gregory, you are shorn as a prisoner of war or a child suffering from an untreatable case of lice.”

      “It’s just hair!  I don’t understand why everyone is so upset about hair!”

      “It is not just hair, my dear.  It is _your_ hair.  Your glorious, silver hair that I take great delight in threading my fingers through when we relax.  That shines so brightly when we take a stroll on a sunny day.  That assumes a positively wicked appearance when it is wet and untended after your shower or a swim.  Or that wonderful day we were caught in the rain…  it is not _just_ hair, Gregory.  Not to me.”

      “Oh.  Wow… Mycroft, that’s the most romantic thing you’ve ever said to me.”

      “If that is the case then I have been woefully neglectful of you and I shall make it a personal mission to remedy that immediately and eternally.  I love you, my dear, and want nothing more than for you to experience the depth of that love every day of our lives together. ”

      “Even with my lack of hair?”

      “My affections are unconditional.  Though they are not impervious to strain.”

      “You bastard.”

      “You must learn to deliver your imprecations without the distraction of your beautiful smile, Gregory.  It diminishes their heat.”

      “Then I’ll have to do something to bring the heat right back, won’t I?”

      “I am open to suggestions.”

      “I think I’ve got one you might like.”

__________

      “Ow!  Tht’s my er!”

      “I d…do apologize, Gregory.  Carry on.”

      Ok, bt whattch it.”

___

      “Buddy hsell!  Stp grubbing my er!”

      “I am sorry, my dear.  I sh…shall take more care.”

      “U’d bletter.”

___

      “S’huve ripped it uff!”

      “You do n…not resemble Van Gogh, my love.  Please, d…do not stop.”

      “I wnt to kheep my ers on by hed!”

      “Then reg…grow your hair… oh yes, lick there again… and I shall have my fa…familiar and c…coveted material to grasp.”

      “Christ, _that’s_ what I’ve been missing… I _love_ it when you pull my hair.”

      “Your speech is too comprehensible, Gregory.  Please return your tongue to more important duties.”

      “You’ll leave my ears alone?”

      “You shall regrow your hair?”

      “I think you’ve convinced me.”

      “Excellent.  I ad…dore our negotiations.”

      “Me tfu…”


End file.
